10 Things to Know if You’re Considering Homeschooling

Thinking of homeschooling your children?  Going back and forth about it?  I started homeschooling my children just over a year ago.  It was scary and liberating all at the same time.

Here is a list of some things I’ve learned and wanted to share if you, too, are thinking about the same path that I took.

1. You don’t have to be a ‘type’.

When people hear that I’m homeschooling my children, I’m not sure if they are surprised, envious, or think I’m off my rocker…or maybe just trying to put me in some sort of ‘bucket’.

After the initial news, sometimes I say something to break the ice like “I don’t wear socks with sandals.”  We have a chuckle and then I follow with, “and I’m not a bible thumper either!”

The truth is, and as the conversation carries on from there, that while I love nature and I love God, neither is the reason I chose to home school.  The perception is often that homeschooling families tend to either be largely evangelical or far-reaching secular.

The reality is that there are lots of reasons why families home school.  Medical reasons, dissatisfaction with public schooling, a desire to be home full-time with their children, consistent job or military relocations, or school bullying are just some examples of why some families choose to home school.

2. You don’t have to do ‘school at home’.

In fact, it’s usually a bad idea. Trying to mirror what the public school does or did in your own home is futile.

First of all, the public school system is built to accommodate classrooms full of all kinds of children, not just your child (or children).  Public schools need use a lot of transition time moving groups of children from one subject or activity to the next and have this built into the day. This can leave very little one on one time to teach to a single child’s individual needs and potential.

With that in mind, trying to teach a single child, or a small group of children, the same way you might teach an entire public school classroom is kind of silly.  Why use the same materials or the same methods that is used to teach a large group at once when you can use materials and methods that can zero in on what works best for you and your child’s gifts, pace and potential?

3. You don’t have to follow your public school’s schedule.

This is somewhat of an extension of #2, but it goes beyond that.

Our local public school start classes at 8:30 and children are usually home shortly after 3:00.  For the longest time, I thought that I had to get ‘school done’ in those hours.  Duh!

I think somehow we are programmed to think that the public schools set the world’s schooling schedule.  Well, learning doesn’t always happen on their clock.  In fact, once I started to ignore that, learning started to become more natural.  Which leads me to my next point…

4. Learning won’t look the same.

In our culture, we tend to compartmentalize too much. We don’t balance our lives well – with work, family, school – we also tend not to be as calm and joyous as we could be, constantly distracted with the business of our lives.

Learning has become this thing – this chore, for so many that happens within certain times and months – and it has become a silly race.  A race of ‘readiness.’

What is the earliest we can get a child to read?  How early can we have a child writing? When is the earliest we can start with homework?

No one wants anyone to fall behind.  In fact, schools are under so much pressure to NOT fall behind while teaching to the tests, that they usually only give elementary students ONE 15 minute – because they just can’t afford the time to let them play longer.

Kindergarten is to prepare for first grade.  Now preschool is to prepare for kindergarten.  I now hear parents talk about how they plan to prepare their children for preschool.

When does the madness stop?   Where is the calm? Where is the joy of childhood?

Learning is fluid.  When the madness is removed…or at least slowed down, learning happens.  Curiosity happens.  Children experience joy, and so do their parents, when they see their children experiencing childhood.

No, learning won’t look like the homework worksheets that you might have once fought over.  But it might look like a conversation that pops out of nowhere, when the noise of your life settles down, and your child asks you to play the board game “Boggle” for fun.

I recently switched my Language Arts curriculum to the Brave Writer program for my children this year.  I’m trying it out – largely based on the philosophy of learning and teaching by the author, Julie Bogart.  She’s a highly accomplished author with an enormously successful business with her language arts curriculum and has schooled her own children.  She writes about homeschooling and learning here.  She has a ton of experience putting the homeschooling parent in the right mindset for success…and at ease.

5. Be ready for well-socialized children.

This one has always gotten me.

People’s old fears about worrying if homeschooled kids will be ‘socialized’??  Are you kidding me?  I talk about this hot topic here.

When my kids were in public school, they got ONE 15 minute outside break, weather-permitting, to play with kids in THEIR OWN CLASS! Plus, they weren’t able to talk in class much at all. They rarely got to socialize with children outside of their grade or classrooms.

What kind of social skills are they really getting if they can barely talk in class and only talk those kids for a few minutes a day?  And no one of other ages?  Isn’t that kind of strange?  Those are not real-life relationships.

When I pulled my children out of public school, most of their friends had been friends they had made through extra-curricular activities throughout the years and long-time friends.  The kids varied in ages by a few years and of varied interests but were diverse.

Once I started to home school them, they kept these friends and then GAINED more friends through home school co-ops and homeschooled clubs and activities.  Their social life only increased!

Homeschooled kids tend to be well versed in socializing very well with children of varied ages, interests and adults, instead of just a few children of lateral ages and interest.  This is an essential life skill, in my opinion.

6. This homeschooling world is way bigger than you could have ever imagine.

With about 1.7 million US homeschooled children and growing, the community of resources and support is only growing.

When I started, I felt terrified.  And to be completely candid, there are times that I am still scared.  (Who wouldn’t feel nervous from time to time, right?)

But the Internet is BIG and there are tons of STUFF out there, no matter the reason you chose to home school, the way you want to go about it, or the questions you may have.  No one can do this thing by themselves.  No one can possibly teach all the subjects to their child all through high school – if you choose to home school through graduation – singlehandedly.  Well, maybe if you were Stephen Hawking.  But I digress. That’s why there is a community.  Co-ops, labs, forums, online classes, class swaps…there are a ton of resources for just about everything.

7. You’ll become a scholar, too.

Since schooling my children at home, I have become a better reader, learned new skills in computing, html and web design, and have published a book.  I NEVER thought I would say that.

But, when you teach, you learn.  And it’s a family experience.  And it’s all connected.  When I read, it sets an example. When I talk about what I read, it sparks a curiosity. When I published my manuscript, I modeled the editing process.  It was a family affair.  We were in it together.

8. Your family will strengthen.

Like most families, values are important to us.

But we can talk about them in more detail when ‘stuff’ happens.  You know, like when someone kicks someone else in the head by mistake because they are rolling around on the floor but said victim kicks back harder and on purpose. Totally mentioning that example for a friend.  You get the idea.

9. You’ll freak out a lot.

You’ll wonder if you’re screwing them up. You’ll wonder if the naysayers were right.  You’ll wonder if you can really do this.  Every homeschooling family has freaked out.  They are lying to you if they tell you otherwise.

10. Then you’ll realize it was all worth it.

You’ll see your child with the look of wonder – not anxiety – in his or her eyes and know it is.